Sunday, April 13, 2008

Precious Little Puke Face

Remember that one time when I wrote about having a reality TV show about my life? And remember how I wanted to name an entire section of it "Bodily Fluids"?

Yesterday we could have taped the first of those episodes.

It began with Norah's early morning feeding, sometime around 4 am. This feeding is particularly hard for me. My body does not like to function at that hour, having slept through that hour every night for the past....21 years. So, at 4 AM I fumble over to the bassinette, lay Norah down and pull out a clean diaper. But in the twelve seconds it takes me to take off the old one and put on the new one, Norah rips out an explosive fart, pooping all over the place. Then she pees on herself as well. Not one to freak out, I merely put on the diaper, wipe her down, take off her clothes and wrap her back in her blanket. No problem.

Later that afternoon we were preparing to run to Wal-Mart to get the poor kid some clothes that fit her. She's not a tiny baby, but certainly too small for newborn clothes. Rusty picked her up and heard the tiny symphony of her bowels, but since we knew we would be back quickly and were guessing she wasn't done yet, we left her diaper as it was. By the time we got back she had peed all the way through her diaper. Excellent.

Then, last night she peed on herself again, just before barfing all over herself, her blanket, my arm, and our bed. And no, this was not some cute newborn spit up. It was honest to goodness newborn barf.


Garrett A. Brown said...

Dont Worry it doesnt stop any time soon. Isaiah is 10 months and still does it from time to time.

Debbie said...

This is called "practice for what's coming". Nothing cute about teenager farts, poops, and barfs, but mom's always there to help them through it all. Enjoy this time; she's going to grow soooo fast! Love ya'll. Aunt Debbie

dawn said...

heh heh heh. puke face. sounds like she needs another descriptor too: poop butt. precious little puke face poop butt. such a big name for such a tiny girl. how sweet!
as soon as i get my tax return, i am going straight to walmart and buying a pink premie outfit. yay!

dawn said...

here's an ad that showed up on your post:

read real-life stories, parent advice, and great tips.

Anonymous said...

(This is Jenny, just so you know)

She may have disgusting bodily fluids, but she is SOOOOO cute!!! My goodness! No offense, and not did I ever think you would, but I'm glad you didn't have an ugly baby. I'm just not good at liking ugly children, as you may recall. I can't wait to see her in person! (possibly from a distance if she is still projectiling fluids...) =) LOVE YOU